


Working

by Gadhar



Category: The Expendables (Movies)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-14
Updated: 2014-11-14
Packaged: 2018-02-25 07:24:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2613257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gadhar/pseuds/Gadhar
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I'm not answering that. I'm not answering any of that."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Working

**Author's Note:**

> Random writing in an attempt to get rid of some frustration. Also probably a move to get into more fluffiness.
> 
> Someone needs to explain to me how [The Beast by Tech N9ne](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3c2eZk1vBQc) inspired this. I don't understand my brain.

Barney holds up his hands, palms out, trying to block out the view of Galgo with his body. Lee's _twitching_ in front of him, vein threatening to blow on his temple, fist clench at his side as he points a stiff finger in Galgo's general direction.

"What the hell are you doing?"

"Lee."

"No, shut up," Lee says to him. "What the hell is he doing?" And then he's back to trying to look around Barney at Galgo, "What the hell are you doing?"

"I'm-"

"Shut up, Galgo." Barney takes Lee by the shoulders, makes him stand still in front of him. He catches Lee's eyes and holds the gaze, moving any time Lee's head so much as twitches. If he can keep Lee looking at him and the not the Spanish tornado behind him, he feels he can probably defuse this situation pretty well. "He's working Lee, relax."

" _Working?_ He's a goddamn mercenary not a fucking chef."

Barney shrugs because, okay, true, but as he's recently discovered, Galgo is quite amazing in the kitchen. "Yes, but he's-"

"He's in your kitchen. Your kitchen. And he's making a bloody fucking _mess._ You don't even let me in here when you cook!"

"Okay, now that's bullshit because we both know you sit there at that counter looking fucking high on the smells alone when I cook."

"Well, you don't let me taste anything."

"Because tasting is a _taste,_ Lee. A sip, a bite. Not, 'let me take this whole fucking turkey and try to shove it in my mouth'. OR, how about the drinking the spaghetti sauce with a damn ladle."

"Those only ever happened once!"

Barney raises an eyebrow, because, even so, there's been plenty of other similar instances where Lee has turned into some sort of food vacuum and essentially 'ruined' dinner. The fact that it was sorta hot watching Lee eat and the separate passions they were running on- eating and cooking- generally turned to something more _shared..._

Well, he was going to ignore that.

"Okay....more than once...but-"

"I asked him to do something for me. I allowed him to be in here. He's not hurting anything."

"But he's-"

"You're still my favorite, no need to get jealous."

"That's not it at _all,"_ Lee grounds out through clenched teeth, crossing his arms.

Barney laughs, that is _so_ it. "Just let him cook Lee. Why don't you go do some of your meditation stuff. Cool off a little."

"I am cool."

"Okay, then go do something else, seriously Lee, please."

"Why? Why do I have to-"

"For me. Please, for me, leave."

Lee huffs but Barney already knows he's won. Lee's stubborn but Barney can succeed in getting through that in some instances. "Fine, I'll leave, but you owe me."

"I'll blow you on the sofa?"

"I was actually talking about food but I'll take both." Lee turns on his heel and, oh yeah, he is definitely swaying his hips on purpose as he walked. Fucking bastard.

"So..."

Barney tears his eyes away from Lee, looking at Galgo who looked thoroughly guilty. "Yeah?"

Galgo's face brightens enormously in the span of one fucking _second_ and that's how Barney knows he's going to hate whatever Galgo is about to say. "Was I _really_ in the running for your favorite? I mean, how close was I? To number one? How close am I now? How do I improve my rating? What number is Doc at?"

"I'm not answering that. I'm not answering any of that." 


End file.
